Hey! Whats Up World!: 03/19/14

Feeling numb
Feeling sad.
What, to you I've only changed from worse to bad?
Your eyes misleading.
Your heart deceiving.
I try to hide,
so that no one sees my soul inside.
In front of the mirror I think to myself,
should I get that razor off the top shelf?
The re-leaving pain only a cut away.
I don't wanna cut only once today.
I slice and slice until the feelings leave.
Only for them to return again.
And push me to the edge.
For what I've got no cure.
I'm sorry, my heart's no longer pure.

You laugh and point at me.
Why can't you just let me be?
Is for you there something wrong?
Yeah, I should have known all along
That you could never change.
Now I'm the one to blame.
I'm the one who's framed.

Why in my world the sun
Sets in the east and doesn’t rise at all?
The blossom on the trees don’t fall
And embrace the ground as snow would in winter.
The birds don’t sing and raise you up out of bed in the morning,
They scream and make you curl up in bed at night.
The spring breeze doesn’t skim past your face and cool you down,
It smacks you in the stomach and suffocates you.
Your friends don’t accept who you are and what you have lost,
They laugh and make jokes. They change you,
No understanding, just abrasive talk without realization.
Everything I am, everything I will be is a lie.
The shadows engulf everything I love. Everything I cared about,
And turns it all on me. Its my fault.
I hide all the pain, so no one else has to suffer,
I let it all out on my own, so no one has to see,
I keep it inside as it slowly controls me.
Drawing me in. Into emptiness.
A rock. Emotionless. Fearless. Dead.
And the best part is, I don’t even know what’s wrong.

I have a pain so deep you'll never see
I locked it away and hid the key.
If I ever really could share it
You wouldn't look at me the same I swear it.
I've seen things I shouldn't have to see
But the only one who ever knew was me.
I faked a smile everyday
For I couldn't stand for you to see me this way
I buried my emotions deep inside my soul
It's this hate I have that keeps me whole
If I ever truly showed you what's inside
I'd run away fast and quickly hide
No matter where I go these feelings stay inside
All I want to do is close my eyes
It's like an eternal torture that never dies
These voices that fill my head
Telling me I'm way better off dead
This pain of living hurts my heart
Should I have ended it from the start?
It's like when I get home I take off a mask
Faking happiness is nearly an impossible task
But some how I manage to get by
Going through everyday about to cry
One day maybe it'll be okay
But of course that day is not today.
How much blood can I shed
Before I'm lying on the floor dead?
Will this pain ever go away?
Maybe tomorrow but not today.

Remember those days when you were young?
Life was as easy as it could be
There were laughs, and stories, and dreams
You saw the sunshine and you were free

Well there comes a point when you realize
That you finally have to grow up
And that hiding under your covers
Won't ever be quite enough

I know those days when it feels like
There's no way you can keep going on
Life just isn't worth living
And nothing could be more wrong

Those days when it's such a struggle
Just to pull yourself out of the bed
The depression, it overwhelms you
The fearful thoughts are spinning through your head

Those days when you feel so broken
And the pieces keep falling apart
Your sky grows stormy and gray
Too much pain for this young, burdened heart

You feel like there's no solution
To this riddle or game they call life
And when it's your darkest hour
It is then that I'll show you the light

The light at the end of the tunnel
When you thought maybe this was the end
I promise there's beautiful sunshine
On this dark road with sharp turns and bends

Though it may not always seem it
There's still happiness in this place
And what you have to realize
Is that it takes a little faith

I have always been here with you
Just as I always will be
And when life knocks you down so low
Just put your trust in me

So remember those days when you were young
Life was as easy as it could be
There were laughs, and stories, and dreams
You saw the sunshine and you were free

Well now here in your darkest hour
Get under the covers and turn out the light
Close your eyes and dream, my child
Let me hold your heart tonight

Why in my world the sun sets in the east and doesn’t rise at all?
The blossom on the trees don’t fall and embrace the ground as snow would in winter.
The birds don’t sing and raise you up out of bed in the morning,
They scream and make you curl up in bed at night.
The spring breeze doesn’t skim past your face and cool you down,
It smacks you in the stomach and suffocates you.
Your friends don’t accept who you are and what you have lost,
They laugh and make jokes. They change you,
No understanding, just abrasive talk without realization.
Everything I am, everything I will be is a lie.
The shadows engulf everything I love. Everything I cared about,
And turns it all on me. Its my fault.
I hide all the pain, so no one else has to suffer,
I let it all out on my own, so no one has to see,
I keep it inside as it slowly controls me.
Drawing me in. Into emptiness.
A rock. Emotionless. Fearless. Dead.
And the best part is, I don’t even know what’s wrong.

Read more at http://www.bestteenpoems.com/poem/whats-wrong-now#kzeZAXM7ggS2xmBw.99

Balon adalah sebuah mainan anak-anak yang terbuat dari bahan karet, dan bisa mengembang jika di isi angin. Balon juga berwarna, ada merah, kuning, kelabu, hijau, biru, dan lain-lain. Balon bisa bikin ketawa, girang, seneng, ngelompat-lompat kayak anak kecil. Beranjak dewasa, kita mengenal tentang kopi. Kopi adalah minuman khusus orang dewasa, kopi itu juga ada yang pahit, ada yang manis, ada yang terbuat berdasarkan robusta, ada yang kopi yang instant.

Ketika kita bermain balon, kita terlihat seperti anak kecil. Ketika kita meminum kopi. kita terlihat seperti orang dewasa. Kalo kedua di gabung jadi satu racikan yang pas pasti jadi kopi rasa balon! Maksudnya adalah bubble coffee yaitu kopi yang di campur dengan sari buah coklat yang membentuk seperti bola-bola yang di masukin kedalam kopi.

Tapi tau ngga sih lo, ketika balon/bubble itu pecah? Masih bakal ada ngga kecerian di mata kita? Masih ada ngga senyum tawa yang terpancar jelas di mata kita? Kita pasti akan sangat menyesal kalo balon yang berusaha kita jaga dengan baik, itu tiba-tiba pecah?

Emang sih ngga seperti keliatannya tapi ada satu penyesalan bahwa, balon yang sekarang pengen gue jaga itu tiba-tiba pecah. Seakan-akan tuh gue pengen nyari mesin waktu, kembali ke waktu di mana gue mendapatkan balon itu, menjaganya ulang dengan rasa kasih sayang dan ngga akan gue share kesiapapun. Tapi ada satu hal yang menjadi pertanyaan gue. Seandainya gue ngga bisa balik ke masa lalu, apakah gue bisa ngebenerin lagi sisa-sisa balon yang udah pecah itu? Gue ngga bisa jawab, jujur bener-bener ngga bisa jawab.

Kopi! Hidup gue kayak kopi! Ada pahit, ada manis, ada-ada aja! Ada yang enak ketika gue bersama creamer, ada yang pait karena kopinya kental dan hitam. Kopi identik dengan kegagahan seseorang, namun kopi juga bisa jadi bahan yang melow. Cinta itu juga kayak kopi men! Di nikmatin pas panas, dan lebih enak kalo lo cuma sekali tengguk. Tapi kadang di dalam tenggukan lo itu ada bagian yang pait. Biasanya juga kopi itu lebih enak pas panas, dan kalau udah dingin pasti udah bosen dan males kalau buat di minum

Ada kalanya kita harus tau kapan dan bagaimana Balon sama Kopi itu harus pergi dari kita! Ada kalanya kita ngga bisa menerka bagaimana dan seperti apa bentuk kepergian ke dua benda. Kalau udah pergi pasti penyesalan, dan rasa salah terbesar itu pasti bakal ada. Dan lo pasti pengen mendapatkan balon dan kopi yang sama.

Di saat seperti ini gue ngerasa gue ngga bakal dapat Bubble dan Coffee yang sama. Sama besarnya, sama rasanya. Semua yang di otak gue itu cuma kegagalan, kebodohan, ketololan yang gue buat sehingga Bubble sama Coffee gue pergi ninggalin gue.

Gue cuma bisa berharap ada kesempatan untuk ngerasain dan memiliki hal yang sama! Dan pada saat itu gue akan ngejagain 2 barang terpenting itu dengan baik dan benar. Ngga ada yang lain di dunia kayak dia. (': Let's Cheers To This (:

Hey! Whats Up World!

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

That Was in My Head Now!

Bubble and the Coffee Theory!